"Whatever you may look like, marry a man your own age — as your beauty fades, so will his eyesight."
- Phyllis Diller
Love
"I want my children to have all the things I couldn't afford. Then, I want to move in with them."
- Phyllis Diller
Love
"What I don't like about office Christmas parties is looking for a job the next day."
- Phyllis Diller
Balance
"What I don’t like about office Christmas parties is looking for a job the next day."
- Phyllis Diller
Happiness
"If you don’t have wrinkles, you haven’t laughed enough."
- Phyllis Diller
Happiness
"We cannot control who we fall in love with, but we can choose how we treat them."
- Beauty and the Beast
Relationships
"I think it takes a strong man to be in a relationship with a strong woman. A lot of people hear the word ‘diva’ and think of it as a negative. I see it as a positive. I want somebody who knows what they want out of life and isn’t afraid to show it."
- Nick Cannon
Relationships
"It’s not what’s under the tree that matters, it’s who’s gathered around it."
Relationships
"As we struggle with shopping lists and invitations, compounded by December’s bad weather, it is good to be reminded that there are people in our lives who are worth this aggravation, and people to whom we are worth the same."
- Donald E. Westlake
Relationships
"A man who correctly guesses a woman’s age may be smart, but he’s not very bright."
- Lucille Ball
Relationships