The proper behavior all through the holiday season is to be drunk. This drunkenness culminates on New Year's Eve, when you get so drunk you kiss the person you're married to.

More quotes by P. J. O’Rourke

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"You know your children are growing up when they stop asking you where they came from and refuse to tell you where they’re going."

- P. J. O’Rourke

Growth

"Everybody knows how to raise children, except the people who have them."

- P. J. O’Rourke

Family

More Reflection Quotes

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"Don’t let yesterday take up too much of today."

- Will Rogers

Reflection

"Life is like a sewer … what you get out of it depends on what you put into it."

- Tom Lehrer

Reflection

"I’d rather regret the things I’ve done than regret the things I haven’t done."

- Lucille Ball

Reflection

"Nothing ever goes away until it teaches us what we need to know."

- Pema Chodron

Reflection

"Happy Tuesday! It is a good day to reflect on the week so far and spread happiness."

Reflection