When a man has a birthday, he takes a day off. When a woman has a birthday, she takes at least three years off.

More quotes by Joan Rivers

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"I enjoy life when things are happening. I don’t care if it’s good things or bad things. That means you’re alive. Things are happening."

- Joan Rivers

Awareness

"People say that money is not the key to happiness, but I figured if you have enough money, you can have a key made."

- Joan Rivers

Awareness

"Life is tough, darling. Life is hard. And we better laugh at everything, otherwise, we’re going down the tube."

- Joan Rivers

Happiness

"People say money is not the key to happiness, but I have always figured, if you have enough money, you can have a key made."

- Joan Rivers

Happiness

"I enjoy life when things are happening. I don’t care if it’s good things or bad things. That means you’re alive."

- Joan Rivers

Happiness

More Aspirations Quotes

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"You are the hope of Israel, ‘children of the promised day’!"

- President Russell M. Nelson

Aspirations

"If you can dream it, you can do it."

- Walt Disney

Aspirations

"Never give up on a dream just because of the time it will take to accomplish it. The time will pass anyway."

- Earl Nightingale

Aspirations

"You dream. You plan. You reach. There will be obstacles. There will be doubters. There will be mistakes. But with hard work, with belief, with confidence and trust in yourself and those around you, there are no limits."

- Michael Phelps

Aspirations

"Everyone's dream can come true if you just stick to it and work hard."

- Serena Williams

Aspirations