You know what it's like having five kids? Imagine you're drowning. And someone hands you a baby.

More quotes by Jim Gaffigan

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"Without Valentine’s Day, February would be… well, January."

- Jim Gaffigan

Love

"Without Valentine’s Day, February would be...well, January."

- Jim Gaffigan

Love

"Without Valentine's Day, February would be...well, January."

- Jim Gaffigan

Love

"Summer vacation does kind of set up an adulthood of disappointment. That first job, you’re like, ‘I have to go to work in July? What is this, Russia?’"

- Jim Gaffigan

Awareness

"Halloween is just finals week for parents."

- Jim Gaffigan

Balance

More Family Quotes

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"Love your family, work super hard, live your passion."

- Gary Vaynerchuk

Family

"Christmas is a time for family, for being together, for creating memories that last a lifetime."

Family

"The best gift of all is the gift of family."

Family

"At Christmas, all roads lead home."

- Marjorie Holmes

Family

"Family is what makes this season so special."

Family