You know you’re getting old when you get that one candle on the cake. It’s like, 'See if you can blow this out.'

More quotes by Jerry Seinfeld

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"Love is like a game of chess. Except the board is flowing water, the pieces are made of smoke and no move you make will have any effect on the outcome."

- Jerry Seinfeld

Love

"You can tell what was the best year of your father’s life, because they seem to freeze that clothing style and ride it out."

- Jerry Seinfeld

Love

"Being a good husband is like being a good stand-up comic: you need ten years before you can even call yourself a beginner."

- Jerry Seinfeld

Love

"I saw a study that said speaking in front of a crowd is considered the number one fear of the average person. Number two was death. This means to the average person, if you have to be at a funeral, you would rather be in the casket than doing the eulogy."

- Jerry Seinfeld

Awareness

"Men don't care what's on TV. They only care what else is on TV."

- Jerry Seinfeld

Awareness

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"It is remarkable how much long-term advantage people like us have gotten by trying to be consistently not stupid, instead of trying to be very intelligent."

- Charlie Munger

Wisdom

"So be careful to live your life wisely, not foolishly."

Wisdom

"In old age is wisdom; understanding in a long life."

Wisdom

"Keep your friends close, your enemies closer and receipts for all major purchases."

- Bridger Winegar

Wisdom

"Until the lion tells his side of the story, the tale of the hunt will always glorify the hunter."

- Zimbabwean Proverb

Wisdom